Tuesday, September 9, 2008

A Little History

I'm moving forward and becoming computer savvy comparatively speaking, so I thought I would check out what blogging could do for a person. I've tried a page on facebook and reconnected with friends I had lost contact with, and I'm curious what will happen as a result of having a blog. Time will tell.
But a little history before moving forward because it's important to know where you've been. Some mistakes are fun to repeat, but some aren't, and personally, there are too many other things to try than make the same mistake twice only to get the same outcome. Not that I live in regret or have made huge mistakes...or at least I don't think I have.
My name is Kristy, and I was raised in a conservative, southern Baptist home and attended Christian academies. Every time the doors of the church were open, my parents believed we should be there front and center. My mom playing the organ and my dad singing in the choir, and my grandparents sitting 5 rows from the front every Sunday and Wednesday and revival. Some may have resented it, but I loved going to church. It was my social circle without homework tied to it. It kept me out of trouble. As a teenager, our youth pastor kept us so busy there wasn't much time to stir things up or make stupid mistakes. And considering I was diagnosed as being ADHD in 7th grade and impulsiveness was a big issue with me, I needed activity and involvement to keep me focused on the right stuff.
I went to college and met the man I married. He wasn't like any of the other guys I had dated, and I was most definitely not like the girls he had dated previously. I think partly why he stayed with it was because I was a challenge. I didn't cut him any slack either, and I made him wait till our wedding night...for many reasons.
We clicked along with life, buying our first house and working for an insurance company, and then we were relocated. It was after we relocated to central Texas that we were told we were infertile...after numerous tests and exams. We tried fertility treatments for 6 months without success. And to be perfectly honest, I wasn't one of those women who felt like she had to be pregnant or give birth to be all woman. As a matter of fact, I told my mom when I was in high school I wanted to adopt 3 kids from different countries. God was already preparing my heart...isn't that neat?
So, after a grueling 6 months and more months after that dealing with the mood swings from all the hormones and shots, we decided to adopt and I began searching for adoption agencies. We went to an orientation to adopt in China, but I was too young. We had a private adoption that didn't work out because the b-mom was not honest with us and we pulled out. Then I hit the wall of depression. I remember calling my mom late one night crying telling her how angry I was at God, and what kind of God would want me to call Him Father when He won't answer my prayers knowing I was willing to go and follow anywhere. My mom encouraged me to eat 3 good meals the next day, exercise, take a vitamin and before getting started in the morning have a quiet time with God. I told her I wasn't talking to Him. She said quiet time allows God to talk to us and she suggested reading the Proverbs of the day. The next morning I did and the first verse I read in Proverbs was about a stiff-necked fool. Point taken.
About a month after that phone call, my husband and I were in an orientation for adoption. It was an agency that worked with only infertile couples and who tried to facilitate only open adoptions when possible. Two weeks after orientation, we were talking with bps (Birth Parents). Two weeks after that we were matched. Two weeks after that, we met our bps. From the time of orientation to the time Erin was born was 3 months. There is so much more to Erin's story, and when she is older and can understand about blogging and who all it reaches, we will put her story on because her story began at her conception. The week she was conceived 7 godly women began praying for her, her bps, and us. It's an AMAZING story.
When Erin was one year old, I knew we were to adopt again, but I wasn't ready. When Erin was about 3, she really started pushing for a baby sister whom she named Sarah. When the social worker came to the house, Erin insisted on giving her the tour, and showed her to her room that had two twin beds. With her Vanna White arms, she said, "This is my bed, and this is my baby sister Sarah's bed." The social worker tried to suggest that Erin may have a baby brother, and Erin assured her she wasn't. We utilized the same adoption agency and were matched with a bp, but the match didn't last. I was heartbroken, but it did prompt me to buy Erin a doll that looked a lot like herself. She was so excited to receive her, and I told her the doll's name was Sarah. Sarah is a lovely name, but it isn't one I would have chosen for our little girl and I certainly didn't want her calling our son Sarah. About a month after the one match fell through, we were talking to a young mom in west Texas, and she had all but chosen us. We had hit it off, but for some unknown reason she didn't choose us. That was devastating to me, but a week later we received the call that a baby boy had been born on August 27th, on his b.m.'s (birth mom) birthday whose name happens to be...you guessed it, Sarah. By the way, I don't believe in consequences. I believe God was in total control of that whole situation. There's more to Pearce's story, but he will have to tell it when he decides to share it.
The day we finalized Erin's adoption in Texas, we moved back home to Louisiana, and that is where we are today surrounded by family raising our children and making a living to support our life.
So that's my story in a very small nut shell. Hopefully, it will help to have this info and help you understand where I'm coming from.

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