Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Chapter 6 - 7 Behind Those Eyes

We make judgments about people every day based on what we see and hear. It's part of what I do for a living. I'm trained to look at people, cut through what they want me to see, and to get down to the meat of the matter, but when it comes to the spirituality of someone else, PLEASE! If we focused on our own relationship during that time wasted pondering someone else's appearance, how much further would we be? This means it would give more time for the reflection to turn on ourselves, cut through what I was putting up for others to see and get down to the meat of the matter.




Did you know that when a person lies the body has an automatic adverse reaction? I know this because I look for these when I'm interviewing someone at work and sometimes with people in general. The pulse quickens. There is the fight or flight syndrome -- do I flee from the source of my stress or do I fight it? The stomach tightens. Maintaining this lifestyle leads to digestive issues and ulcers and worry. Is it any wonder the Bible refers to the Belt of Truth? It girds our waist and stomach area that becomes bloated by our consistent swallowing and telling of lies. It can also be cinched back when we take an honest look and be truthful...but it's not necessarily easy, pleasant, or comfortable. Especially when we've swallowed so many of Satan's lies.




Why are we so willing to swallow Satan's lies? What are we wanting to cover up? Why are we so eager to accept lies as truth? Lack of depth? Lack of faith? Lack of enough faith? There can be such liberation and sweet freedom in living in the truth, but getting to that point is a painful journey.

Lisa Whittle talks about the Cover up:


Insecurity -- masked as drama at my house. My husband and daughter are the drama people, and typically, the drama is taken to a new level the higher the insecurity. I'm just now figuring this out. DUH! Now I just have to figure out the best way to cut through the drama to address the insecurity and encourage and strengthen the best way I can, and pray for them in a different way. This is not to say that I don't have insecurities it's just that is what was revealed to me during this quiet time. After all, I am considering a drastic career change in the next year or so...who wouldn't be insecure about that?




Jealousy -- I am very much like one of the authors Lisa Whittle quoted and talked about. I work in a male-dominated field, and have preferred it to working with women because of the trivial, non-sense some women put out there. But God has blessed me with some truly wonderful girlfriends, and now He has put a passion on my heart for women's ministry. It has to be from Him because this isn't something I would have volunteered for. I believed God has used my girlfriends to show me how relationships with other women can be. It doesn't have to be petty. It can be complementary like Lisa's relationship with Colleen. I am so thankful for my girlfriends who compliment my life, and I pray that I compliment there's as well.




Loneliness -- There is a difference between loneliness and being alone. Loneliness sounds to me like someone is craving contact, wanting to be seen, heard, and held but not succeeding in having those needs met. While I have been lonely even in my marriage at times because I was looking to my spouse to fill a need that was meant for God to fill, it's those who live in loneliness that scare me, like I'm going to be sucked into the vacuum of their life. It has happened to me before, and I got hurt badly by her. I feel for those who are stuck in loneliness.




Being alone, for me, is more of a choice. I have to admit I have gone to the woods in a travel trailer for several days by myself to be alone, to be without children, husband, work, responsibility -- it was the most rejuvenating and life-giving time for me. I loved it, and I am thankful I was allowed that luxury.




Fear -- Some people think the opposite of peace is chaos, but in reality, it's fear. Fear and peace cannot coexist happily together like childhood chums.

I am claustrophobic, and in March of this year, a girlfriend invited me to go to Italy to see a friend. While there, we ventured to several other cities in Italy. It was while we were in Rome that my girlfriend got to see my claustrophobia in full swing. We got into an elevator the size of a coffin in order to go up to our flat. Truly there was only room for 2 people if they were standing in line like school children. My girlfriend was in front and when we got to our floor in my heart I was praising God I had survived and could finally exhale, but after sliding back the first door, she began to try to open the second which would let us out of our coffin. The second door would not open. I tried. We banged on it. We pushed the second floor button again, but there was nothing. Then we heard a rather large, loud Italian man on the other side of the door yelling in Italian at us. He wasn't angry but seemed to become more passionate about what he was saying as my panic went off the charts. We called the host who said he was on his way. Then Cheri, my girlfriend, pushed the button for the first floor. When we got down there the door opened and I was free. Free from my fear, my panic and the coffin! I never took that elevator again. It was the only time Cheri has ever seen me wig-out. There was no peace for me in that elevator only fear -- no matter how unrealistic my fear was, it was real to me. When fear gets a grip on us, no matter what that fear may be, it affects our thinking. It prevents us from thinking accurately and clearly. Had we just pushed the first floor button after realizing the door wouldn't open, I would have been out of that contraption, that predicament in a minute, but instead, I was in that elevator for what seemed to be a minimum of 15 minutes! Fear can be paralyzing and prevent us from doing what we need or should be doing.




I am so grateful that our loving Lord and Savior sees through our defenses, scams, and lies to see the heart of the matter and loves us regardless. He's willing to lovingly remove these "barnacles" as a friend of mine has called them, and heal us completely without guilt and shame. As a matter of fact, God knew what we were going to do before we were conceived and He created us anyway. He knew before we were conceived that we were going to need redemption causing His only Son to have to shed His own blood, and He created us anyway. And not only did He create us despite all that, He loves us in all our humanity. He loves us. Hallelujah, Thank you, Jesus!

9 comments:

Laura said...

I love your statements about the body's response to lying. I wonder if we become desensitized to this if we start to live a lie? Covering up in the ways Lisa discusses in her book...or do we just continually do damage to our bodies? Hmm. Food for thought.
Your adventure by yourself in the woods sounds like heaven to me!

Connie said...

Fear and Lieing...thanks for making things clearer to me. I'm sorry about your fear in the elevator..Not Fun! Connie

Leebird said...

I wanna little trailer in the woods! Did a little bunny hop by frightened as can be? Sorry...:)

Hey...your description of us needing the belt of truth to keep us from swallowing all of Satan's lies...wow...that was inspired Kristy.

Kim@Seasons of My Heart said...

I love your statement when you said:

Why are we so willing to swallow Satan's lies? What are we wanting to cover up? Why are we so eager to accept lies as truth? Lack of depth? Lack of faith? Lack of enough faith? There can be such liberation and sweet freedom in living in the truth, but getting to that point is a painful journey.

Lies...man we are so easily tripped up by the lies satan throws our way.

Thanks for making me THINK...and PONDER.....

Darlene said...

Covering up insecurities with drama? Hmmm. I have no idea what you are talking about. hehe.

You definitely made me think, girl! Love this: "My husband and daughter are the drama people, and typically, the drama is taken to a new level the higher the insecurity. I'm just now figuring this out. DUH! Now I just have to figure out the best way to cut through the drama to address the insecurity and encourage and strengthen the best way I can, and pray for them in a different way"

You are very insightful!
So glad to be on this journey with you,
Darlene

nothingcanseparateme said...

Kristy,

Love what you said about the belt of truth:

It girds our waist and stomach area that becomes bloated by our consistent swallowing and telling of lies. It can also be cinched back when we take an honest look and be truthful...but it's not necessarily easy, pleasant, or comfortable. Especially when we've swallowed so many of Satan's lies.

I think I should put mine on and leave it on.

great post!
Kim

HIS Daughter said...

Kristy,

I know that elevator!! I have been on that "elevator" in Rome and in an ever smaller one in Lisbon!

It not only was the size of a coffin, it was covered in red velvet and padded! We later found out that the little flat had once been a hotel/bordello!

I love your insight!! You should definitely teach women...you can bring it!!

Blessings,
Teri

Carol said...

Kim,
having clostrophbia myself I understand that fear, and panic. Oh my I never thought about how that relates to how we cover stuff up. We do create our own little elevators to be trapped in.

Great post, and insight.

In Him,
Carol

Pamela (MrsJoeB) said...

As a nurse I could really relate to your analogy of swallowing lies and all the gastrointestional problems we get from that...really love your thoughts on wearing the belt of truth!! If only I could use this in my classroom (I am teaching GI this week!!)

Blessings!

In His Graces~Pamela